On Fairness, Tethers, and Props

3 12 2007

To compound to the situation, all of New England is icing over. That means airplanes can’t get in. That means that myself and several other family members, some of which were already en route, are probably not going to arrive in time for… the thing we’re all hoping we don’t have to arrive in time for. BLARGH. This is a lousy, lousy sitch for everybody. I’m pouring my hopes into her recovery, if only because this is a terrible way to endure your twilight. Next goth preener to rant about how death is a beautiful thing gets a claw hammer to the noggin. Ahem.

One side effect of all this is that I’m basically floating without a tether now. Half my support team, the direct half, is MIA. If I was to slip in the shower or crash the car, the results could be devastating; I have an indirect support team on call, but that’s just it, ON CALL. That assumes I’m in any shape to call anyone. Further proof that migrating from the habitrail to the real world geranium is gonna be a steep climb for me, at some point.

The indirect team (which, to drop the vague metaphors consists of Jen & Andy) have been very helpful, and may need to be helpful yet… the laundry’s piling up, ferinstance. I’ve learned the hard way that playing Rock Band renders whatever shirt I’m wearing into a useless sweat rag; I’ve had to get half-nakers in order to play and then wash up and re-shirt afterwards. (Woohoo, hawt Twoof. Except, well, no.) End result is having less cozy-warm sleepers than I normally would have.

Speaking of Rock Band (hah! not done blogging about it!) I have Found My Niche, and that’s as singer. I’ve migrated from Medium up to Hard, and can easily pass songs on Expert (albeit at 80%). The upshot of this? I’m finally getting some props as a gamer. I’m getting people telling me “Wow! Nice skills!”. Nobody’s ever complemented my gaming skills before, except at making NWN mods. Usually I’m the Noob or the Forgettable Midrange Guy. Being told I’m awesome at something was a MUCH needed morale boost this weekend. …of course, then when I switch to guitar, some guy shows up and starts getting 97%s on Expert Vocals and starts bragging about how easy it is, and everybody’s propping him, and I’m getting jealous because I am weak and require affirmation to justify my existence. But at least now and then, I’m considered kinda cool…

Finally, remember, we’ve got a Child’s Play Charity Benefit in Second Life on the 7th, with festivities starting off at 7pm eastern. I think. Maybe later. But showing earlier couldn’t hurt, either. …assuming I’m in-town for the event. If not, uh… well, I better prep for that and make a charity bucket that vanishes/appears according to schedule and gives Keiko stream control, to handle the event for me, or something…

Edit: Can’t believe I forgot to add this, since it was the reason I was about to post — I want to thank everybody who’s been posting sympathy and well wishes. It’s good to know people care when someone’s suffering, even a total stranger… especially in an era that popularly claims humanity is a cynical and nasty lot. Your example to the contrary is appreciated.

Edit #2: No recovery is possible. She’s unconscious now, which is a blessing and a curse — she didn’t get her chance to say goodbye, but at least she’s not suffering. We’ll be going up there sometime between Weds and Fri.

Charity benefit’s tentatively postponed a week; Keiko, if you spot this before I bump into you in SL, let me know if you can do your thing next friday instead. If not we’ll rearrange. I’ll hit SL tonight to start editing the signs, etc. One way or another we ARE collecting money for the kids; this mess deserves a bright spot.

Edit Final: My memere passed away this afternoon. She will be missed. I’m doing as well as can be considered, though… I’ve prepared for it. We’ll pull through. And thank you all for your sympathies.

The charity benefit is officially moved to December 14th, at 9pm eastern, 6pm SL time (pacific). One way you can show your feelings is to donate, either there or directly to Child’s Play. This is a charity very near and dear to my heart as I WAS the provebial child they want to be at play, not so long ago.

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16 responses

3 12 2007
jengagne

Another edit
Actually she did get to say some goodbyes — the only person who didn’t see her conscious was Don, AFAIK. Remember, she was sitting up and talking not so long ago… She had a talk with Mom and well-wished you and I, too. She was just too weak to talk on the phone (they could barely understand her).
Mom said she’d fill us in on all that when we can talk in person. Just not something to go on about at length right there in the hospital on the phone.
As usual, we will ensure that everything goes as smoothly as possible everybody, including you. I know how even mundane things like soap, water, laundry can seem ‘whelming in the face of all this.
Thanks to all the well-wishers from me, too. I think I’ll just post in my LJ to refer ’em over here, since you’re covering it all and then some…

3 12 2007
Stefan "Twoflower" Gagne

Re: Another edit
Okay… good. Good to know. I feel sorry for uncle Don, but I’m glad there was a shot at the apple, to mix metaphors, for her to put some things in order before going to sleep. *sigh* It’s still unpleasant all around, though.

3 12 2007
lostboydv

Re: Another edit
Big, warm sympathy hugs to both of you.

3 12 2007
Anonymous

I’m sorry to hear about everything with the family. Know that you and the family are in my prayers.
-Neuro

3 12 2007
chiave_trust

I wish you peace of mind, at least; it seems like things have been pretty overwhelming, and then add the death of a family member, and… yeah. It’s not much, but you’re in my prayers.
I did have something else to say, but it sounds pretty silly in the light of all this. (It was a request, of a sort, for an interview.) Just get back to me when you’re in the mood; it can wait.

3 12 2007
Stefan "Twoflower" Gagne

I’m always game for shameless self promotion. Hit me up for it next week.

3 12 2007
chiave_trust

Next week sounds good. *hugs*
Actually it’s for Educational Porpoises – otherwise known as a communications class of mine. Is that still okay?

4 12 2007
raigne

I didn’t want to post sympathies before because I didn’t know if it would seem insincere from someone who knows little about you and vice versa, but you and Jen both have mine.
And at the very least, you’re able to think of positive things. It helps, even if it’s only superficial.

4 12 2007
lirazel

I’m coming late to this–was down in Baltimore at a certain wedding, of all things–but you know you and Jen and Andy and your family are all in my thoughts. I don’t know where you’ll be in NE, but if you need, just holler.
Oh, and if you get there while your grandmother is still alive, speak to her, even if she’s unresponsive. People in that state hear more than we think. Nearly the last thing my mother did was laugh–her children were all gathered round, and one of my brothers made a feeble joke, and we laughed because otherwise we were all going to cry–and she laughed, hearing her family laugh, even though we’d been told she couldn’t respond to us any more.
*hugs*

4 12 2007
cmdr_zoom

Good idea.
And best of luck coping with things at home on your own. :/

4 12 2007
Stefan "Twoflower" Gagne

Still okay. One thing I’m good at doing is talking in general. And maybe I can get you a good grade out of it.

4 12 2007
delfina

Oh! I hadn’t checked up on LJ in a bit!
I’m so sorry and all of my love goes out to you and Jen and the rest of your family I don’t know.

4 12 2007
Stefan "Twoflower" Gagne

I’m doing okay, actually. As okay as can be expected. My job right now is Acceptance (got that bit largely down, after learning that she was able to talk to her children one last time) and Self Amusement In The Name of Keeping Spirits Up. Celebrate life, you know?

4 12 2007
storytellersjk

I just wanted to drop in and express my deepest condolences. My Grandma died under very similar circumstances a few months back and I remember the conflicted feelings all to well. What compounded even more was that the Alzheimer’s had already all but taken her a couple years before. It was a weird, extremely emotional time for me and my family but we got through it relatively unscathed by relying on one another for support. As anyone who reads your blog knows, you more than have that kind of support so I know you will be okay. Again my most heartfelt sympathies.

4 12 2007
Anonymous

Sorry to hear about your grandmother. My grandmother passed just this past month at the begining of November. She was 97 and had taken a turn for the worse a few days before it happened. My mother and one of my aunts were there when she passed away and it was peaceful which was nice.
I noticed that you used the word ‘memere’. Was she french? The reason I ask is that’s what I called my grandmother as well and she was Acadian french. It was kinda weird to hear her referenced by her real name at the funeral since I just knew her by ‘memere’.
You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers

4 12 2007
Stefan "Twoflower" Gagne

Yeah, we used memere to distinguish between her and my other grandmother (who died about two years ago). I figured I’d use the usual term not to confuse anyone, but her ‘true name’ felt more appropriate there.

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